So it’s maybe been a while…

I looked at my last post date. It was in September. So what’s so freaking important that I haven’t posted since September? Well, I got a job. It’s not, like, saving the world or anything, but it suits me. In fact, I come up with new reasons it suits me more every day. I work three days a week, which is exactly the right amount for me right now. The Viv is in preschool, so I might pick up another day next year when she starts kindergarten. 

My New Year’s resolution was to stay off the computer so that I might be more product. So far I’m failing at that pretty miserably. It’s a work in progress. I picked my word for 2013. It’s Persevere. Why? I feel like I’m really on the right track on a lot of things, but I’m not there yet, so it’s a reminder to stay the course and not give up. My word for 2012, for the record, was leap. I thought it appropriate for a leap year, plus it was an encouragement to take risks and put myself out there.

While trying to get my feet under me with my new job and balancing housework, four kids and their activities, and my husband and his activities (he also started a new job as a high school band director, which is no small time commitment), basically all of my hobbies got dropped. I have a crocheting project that’s a massive WIP. I work on it in the car when I’m waiting for the bus or soccer practice to end. It’s a huge granny stripe afghan, which will hopefully be keeping us warm by 2015. At the rate I’m going, that’s a little optimistic.

I’ve taken only a very few photos lately – the obligatory Christmas shots and a rainbow on Monday. 

I’m feeling kind of down about that, but I’ve been coming to a bit of peace about that. I’m just not sure I am capable of being a professional photographer. I don’t really doubt my photography skills (well, sometimes), but I am not naturally a people person and I’m very shy about talking about my business. So I think I’m closing shop and taking photos for friends and family for fun again. I’m not sure yet how I feel about this in the long term, but for right now, I think this is the right thing.

I haven’t knit anything lately, but I did buy some yarn today to make a gift for my sister. I found this yarn that makes a cute scarf. I got it in a variegated purple and hopefully I can finish it in time for my sister to wear it this weekend for the Ravens game. She’s a major fan. Me, I like the Ravens – they’re my hometown team and I have a strong sense of place. Her? She freaking LOVES the Ravens.

December Daily…

Another idea inspired by Pinterest (seriously – can I get kickbacks for blogging about nothing else this month?) is the December Daily. I mean, I know it didn’t originate on Pinterest. But that’s how it came into my awareness. I’m in serious need of some mojo rejuvenation. I’ve been going weeks without picking up my camera or digiscrapping. I’ve been in a bit of a funk. So I think doing something like a December Daily (and I’m contemplating a Project 365 – a picture a day for a year) is just what I need to kickstart my creative juices.

My plan is to do this in 8.5x11 format, not my usual scrapping format (I much prefer squares in general, but the wide open spaces of 12x12 in particular), but it will be easy to print my digital pages (I thought about going old-skool and breaking out the papers, but…nah) at home and actually have a finished book in my hands on January 1 (or let’s be realistic – sometime in Janurary/Febrary-ish).

Just because…

This photo makes me laugh. It’s so…them, right now. Mr. T is all “whatever.” Miss G is a smiling ray of sunshine. Miss S is distracted by something. The Viv is exerting her independence (it was about 75 degrees out and she found mittens and insisted on wearing and either I’m getting soft in my old age or this is a battle I never would have fought, so I let her.). It’s also taken in the shed on our farm, which is very us right now.

Years from now, this picture will say more than it knows. Twenty years from now, my kids might say “in 2011, Mom was an obsessive photographer finding fabulous light. Her cell phone in its cute purple case is sitting behind the kids. Americans still used fossil fuels to power our vehicles. Can you believe it?”

Who knows? I think about the photos from twenty years ago and all that’s changed. And all that hasn’t. I took pictures of everything – big scenes, little details. I was the memory keeper. Funny how some things don’t change.

Our photo date…

So I missed my creative post yesterday, but well, I’m still fighting to get the mojo back. The kids had a sleepover at their grandparents’ house last night, so I asked Tom to drive me around to some nice icy rivers and creeks nearby for a photo date. I suggested a few places I had noticed and he came up with several more.

Some photography ramblings...

After much agonizing, I made a semi-snap decision (because, really, can it be a snap decision if I've agonized over it for months?) and ordered a new camera. For almost a year, I've been planning to buy the latest Pentax model. I currently have a 4 year old Pentax DSLR that in addition to having completely outgrown, is sorta broken (between leaving it out in the rain and totally dropping it from time to time, I actually don't blame it and it works much better than it ought).

But as I thought about where I want to go in the future, which is most likely toward professional photography, I realized that I don't want to put more money into lenses for Pentax if it won't grow with me. So I began looking at other systems, almost sure that I would switch to Nikon, because several of my photography hobbyist family members use Nikon. I barely considered Canon in most of my agonizing. Until I did. And stopped agonizing.

Despite it's Mac-like following (part of the reason I won't use a Mac is the cult-like attitude most Macs have), Canon just seemed to make more sense for me, although I don't have a great reason. I like where I can go with it. I like the selection of lenses (which is probably the most rational argument I have).

Feeling stupid here...

I just discovered custom white balance on my digital camera - rediscovered, really. I have an older (I've had it for three years so in the world of digital photography, it's practically an antique) Pentax. I've been getting frustrated with it lately because my white balance just always seems to be off. I usually pick a scene based white balance (like cloudy or shady) and my pics are all yellowy. But the other night we were outside as I was trying to take my youngest's one-year-old picture (I was only two weeks late). She hates the grass, so I took a vintage tablecloth (I inherited three boxes of vintage tablecloths from hubby's great-aunt) and folded it up under her. It was pure white, so I decided - what the hell? I'll take a custom white balance off it. And my pictures are spot on for color (to my eyes at least).

So now I'm feeling dumb. All these years I've tried to do custom white balances and I think I've been doing it wrong. Although, this is recent, so maybe it's my old camera too. Our house is for sale right now and we stand to make a little bit of money off it. A portion of that money will go to the camera of my choice (eek - pressure - decision - help!) Luckily (actually unluckily) our house hasn't sold yet, so no decisions need to be made any time soon.

A picture from my shoot the other night? Sure...here ya go.

Sometimes you just have to fake it...

The first trimester of this pregnancy really sapped me of my will to...do just about anything. I haven't really regained it yet. I've picked knitting up again and even got an entire baby sweater knit, but the hobby that I'm really missing but still lacking the motivation for is photography. I'm trying to just get up and do it, since I'm mid-second trimester and still not showing, I can contort on the floor the way I need to and I supposedly have energy (the insomnia's kind of countering that, though).

I was looking at buying a new camera last night, but I just don't feel like I can do that if I'm not using the one I currently have. That's how I mentally "earn" new hobby supplies in general. If I scrapbook, I can buy new scrapbooking items. If I'm actively knitting, I can buy new yarn. But I'm not habitually taking pictures lately - I only have a handful from Christmas. How sad is that? Last Christmas I think I had over 100. This Christmas I had maybe 10 and I didn't even upload them to my computer until the middle of January.

I'm feeling guilty that I'm not more excited about this baby. I guess it's partly because I'm not showing and well, it IS the fourth time I've done this. I'm still just as nervous and panicky about stupid things as I've ever been, but I haven't gotten all the little clothes out or obsessed over the baby name book (I think we have names picked out anyway, but I still looked even after we'd decided on the other kids' names). Of course, maybe if Baby hadn't been so stubborn when we were at the ultrasound and showed off its goods, I'd be getting out the pink or blue from when the others were babies.

Up close and personal

Giraffe
Originally uploaded by christyc730

This is my middle DD's hand feeding a big old giraffe. Actually, she's a teenager, in giraffe terms, not old at all. I just felt like sharing one of my very favorite pictures from our trip to South Carolina. Can you believe you can actually feed the giraffes? We also fed goats and llamas, but they were way less exciting. The whole zoo is sort of set up to look like the animals aren't really enclosed. Now I don't know about most people, but me? I like the lions behind very sturdy bars. The illusion that they're roaming free is just a little unsettling. I had to investigate and they really are behind a fence - an electrified one at that, but it was freaky to see the lions, tigers and bears just lounging around, with the appearance that if they decided to walk across the rocks they could roam the zoo.

This picture is one of my photographic screw-ups. I tried to explain it to Tom but he doesn't really get it or see the big deal. I shot this - in absolute broad daylight - at ISO 1600. Because we'd just been inside and I was taking pictures of the tropical aquariums at that ISO. They turned out great. I forgot to switch it back to 200. So beautiful outdoor pictures like this are now full of noise or grain. I'd say lesson learned, but I had just done the same thing on our first day walking around the river. I have tons of cool kudzu growing on weird things shots that are all grainy. And when we went to Punta Cana in November, I went from our hotel room (1600) to the beach without changing ISO there too. So I don't seem to have learned anything. Maybe now I will. Yeah, I'm not hopeful.


And I can't believe I forgot. Do you know what happens one week from tonight? Oh, yeah. College football, baby. Looks like I"m going to be forced to watch the team that totally whipped my team in the Sugar Bowl last year when I'd rather watch the Rutgers game, but I'm so excited that the season's starting again that I'll take what I can get.

Good morning...

My morning ritual. Before we take Mr. T to school, one cup of coffee in my Starbucks mug (even though I don't really like Starbucks all that much - there's a sort of intimidation factor in ordering there that just drives me crazy. Although...I did have a peppermint mocha there when I bought this mug that was TO DIE FOR. Tom is a teacher and as such gets gift cards and things. He's not a coffee drinker at all - not even hot beverages unless he's just been outside shoveling snow or something...which we might have like a foot of this week.)

Then while we're freezing our behinds off walking him up to the school, I dream of getting home to our nice warm house and that second cup of coffee. Because it takes two to make me function. But more than two and I'll be sick. Unless it comes with dessert, in which case, coffee's always cool.